By Kai Curry
NORTHWEST ASIAN WEEKLY
“I wanted and needed to tell my story.”
Philanthropist, entrepreneur, and Seattleite Scott Oki started writing his memoir several years ago when he was diagnosed with dementia. He wanted to get everything down before he forgot. But he wasn’t making progress.
“My dissatisfaction was punctuated by a driving sense of purpose in my life.” He called upon several people to help, including his wife, and at last, in 2024, the book, “On My Honor, I Will Do My Best,” was published.
If you have been curious about Oki, here you will find detailed descriptions of his family and his work. It starts with his grandparents on both sides back in Japan, where life in the cities was insecure and life in the rural areas was unprofitable. Thus the decision to emigrate. Jukichi, his grandfather on his mother’s side, came to Seattle (making him an issei, or first generation Japanese immigrant), and worked at Manca’s Café. He sent for a picture bride and Kiyoko, Oki’s maternal grandmother, arrived in Seattle at the age of 19, where she learned to be a barber. Kimiko (Kim), their daughter, is Oki’s mom. There are fascinating depictions of life in an earlier time in Seattle, such as going to the bathhouse in the basement of the Panama Hotel, when Japantown, or nihonmachi, was an entirely different, vibrant quarter of the International District.
Kitaro Oki, Oki’s paternal grandfather, incredibly, upon arrival in “the West,” rowed a boat from Vancouver, Canada to Bellingham, Washington, where he was quite content. He also sent for a picture bride, and Shizuno, Oki’s paternal grandmother, arrived. It was a time when racism was on the rise and very few Japanese families were left in Bellingham. Their son, Oki’s dad, Kiyoto (who went by Bob), relocated to Seattle with his mom and sister. He started going to Buddhist Church, where he learned—and agreed—that the worst evils of the world were greed and selfishness (something that was passed onto Oki, who has become a famous philanthropist). Bob met Kim, and they hit it off, but their romantic relationship didn’t make too much headway until, of all times and places, they were both relocated to the Minidoka incarceration camp during WWII.
It was a shock when the announcement came—that Japanese people living on the West Coast would be forcibly removed from their homes, jobs, schools, and lives. Bob never finished college (although he finally got an honorary degree from the University of Washington, a moment he was present for that Oki counts as among the most moving and remarkable in his own life). Bob recalled that, as soon as the government announcement was made, he felt people started looking at him differently on the street, “like he was an enemy, like they wanted to kill him.” Bob was never again the same person inside. Yet he and Kim, who married at Minidoka, were throughout Oki’s life a compatible and happy couple who passed on admirable values to their children.
All were proud Americans.
The title of Oki’s memoir comes from the Boy Scouts oath. Participating in the Boy Scouts, that quintessential American organization, was a throughline in the lives of the family for three generations, including Oki’s own kids. Oki himself was determined to be the youngest Eagle Scout of his troop (achieved—a start of him setting and achieving exceptional goals for himself); his sons set out to beat his record (achieved, they beat Dad and then each other). The Scouts have also been the focus of Oki’s work to promote equality and opportunity for kids—he long campaigned to allow girls to take the same promotion path as the boys, to become Eagle Scouts.
Scott Oki as a young man in his Boy Scout Troop 252 uniform. (Photo courtesy of Scott Oki and of o-kaisha Publishing.)
Oki very early on showed his drive—when it felt right, and he put his heart and mind to it. There were hiccups when it didn’t feel right, such as when he went to college for electrical engineering, and spent most of his time playing pool and cards for money instead (when interested, Oki usually excels). College then wasn’t for him, at least not in that subject, and this self-made man, a senior executive at Microsoft when it was still a “startup,” this man who helped change the world as we know it, flunked out (he has since earned plenty of equivalent accolades).
“We grew up poor in finances, but rich in family closeness,” Oki said. Family, connection, friendship, loyalty to land and country, these have all shaped him and stayed with him. “My parents instilled in me the meaning of hard, honest work.” In particular, the difference that his dad delineated, between doing one’s best and being the best, became one of Oki’s primary tenets.
Oki thrived being both Japanese and American. He has drawn gladly from both heritages. A young man in the 60s and 70s, he admits to becoming a sharp dresser in order to make up for his then slight physique (weightlifting was added to his regimen in due time). While his thoughts always went outwards, he wasn’t immune to the need for personal achievement, and early on set himself a goal to make money. It took some trial and error but then came Microsoft. Goal achieved. Driving around in his Porsche, with his 70s ‘stache, jeans, and open-chested shirt, Oki was a stud! As a key figure of Microsoft’s early leadership team, Oki never felt a victim of racism—for which he counts himself lucky. Along the way, he took on many pursuits—travel, cigars, golf, skiing—and married the love of his life, Laurie Bellio, who he describes as the “pillar” of their family. Laurie has been right there with him and with The Oki Foundation.
Oki and his wife, Laurie, with their children, Alexander, Elisabeth Callan, and Nicholas. (Photo courtesy of Scott Oki and of o-kaisha Publishing.)
Oki began in earnest his life of giving, and of “returns” on that giving, after he left Microsoft. “More than a feeling, gratitude is a set of behaviors,” he said. Throughout the memoir, Oki never hesitates to recognize those who have helped him (he’s not a one-man show; he’s a great collaborator who doesn’t mind coming up with the helping funds and then giving the lead to a colleague). Oki shouts out to every mentor or friend, and to his family members. Whatever his interest has touched upon, Oki has supported in some way—from resurrecting the Seattle Sounders soccer team to building the Newcastle Golf Course. Famously, he founded Densho to preserve the memories of the Japanese Americans who went through incarceration. Densho means “to pass on stories to the next generation,” the same as what Oki is doing with this book.
We might not be the best at everything, yet we can strive to do our personal best.
No one can achieve this 100% of the time; yet, Oki has done his best for our city, our county, our state, and when his reach extended that far—which it has—our nation. And still does. After the dementia diagnosis that got him writing the memoir, Oki turned his legendary drive onto maintaining his physical and mental health. He took up playing musical instruments again—something he’d done in school. He became a black belt in Kempo kung fu and learned to breakdance! Even at an advanced age, he never stops seeking self-improvement.
Oki has gotten back into musical instruments. Here he plays the Japanese shakuhachi, a bamboo flute. (Photo courtesy of Scott Oki and of o-kaisha Publishing.)
During the height of his philanthropic activity, Oki founded or co-founded over 20 nonprofits and sat on over 100 boards. But it never ends. That was the point. The organizations, the people, carry on the work into the future. Today, Oki’s active brain and generous heart still seek to make an impact on everyone around him. “People often think I will tire myself out, and yet, I do not.”
Proceeds from “On My Honor, I Will Do My Best” will go to helping children.
Kai can be reached at newstips@nwasianweekly.com.