Oh, I know a few things. I know that wearing shorts on our weekly date night is a huge no-no. I know that reading a magazine during dinner is genuinely frowned upon. And if you’ve ever wondered, playing a tennis match on our anniversary is absolutely inexcusable.
“Maybe we should go to China this year.” These are the eight words my wife, Maya, used yesterday to officially announce that we will begin planning a family trip to China some time this year.
In the last year, I wrote about tea leaf plucking monkeys in China that supposedly know how to pick tea leaves when they are good and ready. With my active mind, I immediately conjured up thoughts of the training process involved in training monkeys to pluck and deliver tea leaves and not other things like, say, a pair of shoes hanging from a telephone wire, an errant hub cap, or an old TV Guide from the 1970s.
My wife and I are now disciplined enough to apply our version of “tough love” to nearly every aspect of their lives, whether we are trying to get them to speak, read and write, dress themselves, brush their teeth, or use the bathroom.
People are hurting out there.
Quiet now. Keep your head down low. Don’t take your eyes off him. If he looks your way, keep still.